The Better Thing

Last night I went to church with my oldest three children and my DH stayed home with the youngest two, who are still suffering from a bad cold.

The sermon was about being too busy. The passage was the very familiar one about Mary and Martha when Jesus came to visit their home. At first I thought to myself "I am the opposite of busy!" I am a SAHM with no car during the day, so I can't even run errands unless my husband is home. I can't commit to coffee meetings with friends, or volunteering at school. I basically spend a majority of my time here in my home, and I am content to do so.

To some, that might seem great. You might even think that I've got it all together. Far from it. After talking to a friend last night I realized that I really am busy. It's just a different kind of busy. I am busy doing dishes, washing laundry, picking up toys, mopping floors, cleaning up messes, and completing other important tasks on my "to do" list at home.

My friend confessed that even though she stayed home with her kids when they were young, she wasn't really there for them a lot of the time. She was cleaning out closets and keeping busy around the house, but was missing out on the important thing. Time with her family.

Because of her honesty, I now have a new perspective about being at home. I am blessed with five beautiful children that need me. They need me to spend time with them and show them my love. Housework is important too, but there has to be a balance.

This week I am going to stop and think before I say "Not right now, I'm busy." Keep a schedule, yes. At the cost of missing out on quality time with my family? No. I choose family. I choose to slow down and enjoy this time at home with my kids. It is, after all, "the better thing."

Luke 10:41-42 "Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."

Developing Patience

"I'm not ever gonna do ______ (insert the current thing she's in trouble for) again Mommy!"

This is my three year old daughter's new favorite phrase. In the past few days she has spilled rice all over the floor, helped herself to an entire package of graham crackers, colored on the dining room floor with red crayon, dipped her little fingers into the cinnamon sugar/brown sugar tub, and devoured the rest of her sister's chocolate Easter bunny.

I prayed for patience, so God brought me more situations to practice patience. Funny how it works that way. As I think back on the way I have handled moments like these in the past though, I realize that my patience really is growing. I am learning to discipline my daughter in a firm, but gentle way. I am also learning to be consistent and not get frustrated when she tests me again, and again...and again.

1 Corinthians 13:4 "Love is patient..."

We're Good

Yesterday I was not having the best of days. It wasn't any big thing that went wrong, it was just a bunch of little things that added up throughout the day and then by dinner time, I was a wreck. As I was preparing dinner, my youngest son stood at my feet crying. The other four kids were being rowdy and loud playing with their dad and in the heat of my frustration I yelled at my husband "WOULD YOU PLEASE TAKE CARE OF THE BABY WHILE I GET DINNER READY!"

He very calmly picked up our son and said as he walked away "Don't yell at me in front of the kids."

I immediately knew in my heart that I should not have shouted. Later, when I had the time to apologize, he said "We're good" and gave me a hug. He's like that. Never been one to hold a grudge.

I know someone else who's like that. His name is Jesus. He is the author of forgiveness. His love is unconditional. And when we come to Him with our mistakes, He says to us "We're good."

My husband is forgiving. My Lord is forgiving. So why didn't I feel better? The answer: I needed to forgive myself. We all make mistakes from time to time. In the heat of the moment I lost it and yelled at my husband. The important thing is to receive forgiveness and learn from the moment. Then next time I feel myself about to explode, hopefully I will handle the situation differently. For now, I am giving myself grace, and room to grow. I am going to say to myself "We're good."

Psalm 103:12 "as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us."

Looking Back and Laughing

I wanted to post a funny story about my fifth anniversary. It was almost 8 years ago. I had great expectations for our 5 year. We didn't have kids back then so we made reservations at a fancy hotel suite. I had been hinting for weeks that I would like diamond studs for a present. I am not good at waiting so the morning of our big day I gave him a big kiss with his present. He thanked me and got ready for work. After work, we went out to a nice dinner and a movie, packed up our bags, and went to our hotel suite. They even upgraded us at not cost because our room was next to a room where they were doing some construction. It was almost perfect. All I needed was my diamond studs to put the icing on the cake.

Time passed and no present. We explored the hotel and went to a wine tasting. No diamonds. In the mean time, I was getting pretty upset. I mean, didn't he get the hints I gave him about what I wanted? Finally, just before we went to bed, I asked. I said "honey, this has been a great anniversary. I have really enjoyed everything. But I have to admit, I am a little upset that you didn't get me anything." (It probably didn't come out as sweet as I'm making it sound.)

After hearing me out and letting me cry, he said "I guess you didn't see the box sitting on the night stand when you woke up this morning!"

Boy did I feel terrible. All that time I thought he had just forgotten!

That's the story of why my earrings are my favorite piece of jewelry and I'll never jump to conclusions about my husband's gift-giving abilities again.

The First Cut

Left to right: "So you think you can cut my hair huh?" , "Just try and catch me!"

Bottom: "Boy am I glad that's done!"

Today I added another "qualification" to my job description as a mom. Hair stylist. A professional, I am not. I cut my youngest son's hair for the first time. There are a lot of reasons I have been putting off this task. My number one reason was that I was afraid I would botch it! Ok. So I confess that's not really my number one reason. He's 15 months old...it's not like it's going to scar him for life if he gets a bad hair cut.

The real reason is because the first cut is always the clincher for me that he's not a baby anymore. I cut off those cute baby curls on the back of his head, and those long baby strands on top that have been there since he was born. Call me sentimental, but I saved the curls. I will put them in his baby book and some day he will probably shake his head at me and say "oh mom, why'd you save my hair?"

My last born may be moving into toddlerhood, but in my heart he'll always be my baby.

Taking Inventory of my Heart

Over the weekend I did an inventory of what I had in my pantry and made a list of what I needed to re-stock after a long, hard winter. My shelves were looking pretty empty! With list and coupons in hand, I headed out to do my shopping on Saturday. I had three stops I wanted to make. Three hours later, I was home with a mass of groceries to be put away. Soon, my shelves were stalked again, and I felt better.

I say all this with a point in mind, not about groceries, but about the condition of my heart. The question came to mind "Is my spiritual pantry empty?" Yes. It's been a long, hard, winter both physically and emotionally here. I don't mind admitting that I am one hungry woman! Not for food, but for a fresh filling of the Holy Spirit; for the Word of God to fill me up again.

Paul refers to the Word as "solid food" in Hebrews 5:14. Jesus said in Matthew 4:4 "It is written: 'Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.' "

I am glad that when my shelves are empty, He is there to supply me with the spiritual food that I need. As I stop and take inventory, He is ready and waiting to re-stock the pantry in my heart to overflowing once again.

Menu Matters

Since we were on the topic of Menu Making at Home Sanctuary today, I thought I would share a few of my thoughts on the idea of having a weekly menu. Here are some of the reasons why I plan my menu every week:

1. It helps me to create a grocery list and keep on budget.
2. I can plan around our schedule so there aren't any surprises or scrambling on the days we have something going.
3. I don't get to the end of my day and stress out about what's for dinner.

Here are a few things that I did when I first started menu planning and still implement today:

1. I gathered together my recipes in files marked "everyone likes", "adults like", "kids' favorites" and "would like to try".
2. I try to use a crock pot recipe at least once a week.
3. I try to use a "double it and freeze it" meal at least once a week.
4. I have a breakfast night (it's easy and fast!)
5. I have a leftovers night.
6. If it fits, I have a new recipe night too.
7. There's always room for pizza (homemade or otherwise) or take out! : )

Just a few more notes:

• Coupons are your friend!
• I don't stress if we detour from the menu. You have to leave room for last minute change if necessary.
• I stock up my pantry with staples. No pantry? I use a wall of shelves in my laundry room due to lack of space in my kitchen!
• When I make a menu, I type out all of the recipes and keep them in a clear sheet protector. I also make a list of groceries needed with it so that I can just grab that and add any extra groceries to it that I need when I shop. All of my menus then go into a binder. I am up to 8 now!

There you have it. If a busy mom of 5 can menu plan, anyone can do it! Happy eating! : )

Proverbs 31:15b ...she provides food for her family...

Priceless Memories

I haven't posted in a while because our family has been so sick. This time around I got it and it put me out of commission for days. We're all on the mend now though, which is encouraging.

The other day I was watching tv and I saw one of those MC commercials with the trail of money spent and then at the end it says "priceless." Our budget has been kind of tight lately so we have really put a halt on unnecessary spending. I think the commercial is very creative, but who says you have to spend money to make priceless memories?

I was talking on the phone with my mom a few days ago and she gave me some of the best advice I have ever received from her. I told her that we were pinching pennies, and she said "When you were little and we didn't have a lot of money we had to get very creative. The best thing you can do is find projects around the house to do together as a family. Sort toys, clothes, even papers with your kids. They'll love it just because they're spending time with you. You're also teaching them the value of working and organizing. Or give them a box and some crayons and markers and let them decorate it to make their own spaceship or car. Encourage them to use their imagination. The best memories in life are made using little or no money."

She's right. Some of my best memories are counting nuts and bolts, (we had a hardware store) or building forts out of blankets and furniture. It doesn't matter how many times I line up and dress up all of my daughter's barbies, she loves it every time. The other day the whole family went out into the yard for "clean-up" time after a long hard winter. It was so fun to watch my kids get so much joy out of working in the yard together. Together, we're working on building a few priceless memories of our own.

Better Together

March already? Wow. That means Spring is just around the corner. Yippeeeeee! I can't wait to open all of my windows and let in some fresh air!

At the moment, my thoughts are drawn to a verse on a bracelet I am wearing today. It is Ecc. 4:9-12 "Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken."

The words on my bracelet are "Better Together." I have to admit that in the past I have had a "do it yourself" mentality. It is the hardest thing for me to accept help when I am in need. Take, for instance, this past weekend. First, my 3yr old dd got the flu so I was up all night with her Friday. Plus I have been very sick with a cold and not up to my usual routine. I spent most of Saturday and Sunday on the couch trying to recover. My DH has been so understanding and did most of the cooking and cleaning all weekend. But each time he started in on something, I tried to get up and help. He just told me to go lay back down and rest. Would you believe that was the last thing I wanted to do? For me to just lay around while someone else does the hard work is like pulling teeth! I'll help others all day long, but accepting help for myself is for some reason difficult.

I'm always telling my kids "just ask for help, that's what mommy and daddy are here for!" I guess I should take a little of my own advice once in a while! I'm still feeling a little under the weather, but with my husband's help, we made it through the weekend. Just goes to show you that life really is "Better Together."